Whew. I need to sit down. Not because I’m tired – no, no, no! Because the sheer weight of history has just dropped itself right into my lap like a rogue anvil on a Thursday. Today, I come to you not as editor of the Toontown Blog – but as the writer of an achievement so arbitrary, even Alec Tinn was quoted saying, "Who's counting?" 

That’s right: This is Toontown Blog Post number ONE. THOUSAND. That’s right – 1-0-0-0! Four digits! Triple zeroes! More posts than I have pies! (Which is saying something, because I stockpile those. How can you pass up a pie for only one jellybean?)

When I first started scribbling away blog posts all those years ago – armed with nothing but Cannons, a dream, and a forged Toon Trooper badge – no one believed I’d make it this far. They said, "Sir Max, don’t you think 1,000 posts is a bit much?" And I said, "Yes." Then I did it anyway.

Now, I know what you’re thinking: "Sir Max, surely you didn’t write one thousand blog posts just to brag about it." And you’d be mostly wrong! Because today’s not about me – it’s about you, the Toontastic readers who made it all possible!

While we look back on some of the greatest hits of the Toontown Blog, I’ve gone ahead and hidden three secret codes throughout this very blog post. Yep, three! One gets you 1,000 jellybeans, another gives you 1,000 Racing Tickets, and the last one unlocks a glorious hour of Double Gag XP. Think of it as a gift from me to you. Or more accurately – from me, to me, to you. (I might have tested them first.) Keep your eyes peeled and cursors curious, because the hunt begins… NOW!

Mischief and Misadventures

Now, naysayers never imagined we’d hit 500 blog posts, never mind 1000 blog posts – especially after I started my one-day, one-Toon writer’s blockade ten years ago! The Toontown Blog has allowed me to chronicle many of my adventures over the years, taking me to places no Toon had ever dreamt of venturing. From my soothing nature walk that brought the Fellowship of The Bean together, to eating too many cakes (and chocolates!), the Toontown Blog has served as the perfect home to showcase so much about what I think makes Toontown great!

We’ve raised money for some Toontastic charities, celebrated the work of some of Toontown’s top Toon Troopers, and even been invaded by the Cogs plenty of times – did anyone ever work out what this meant?

We’ve had some seriously sabotaging golf balls… and butterflies. I still think those butterflies are a threat, but nobody ever listens to me! From Black Friday to Black Cats, we’ve not missed a single important news story!

Hang on, it’s Friday the 13th next week... We certainly won't be missing that one!

Hoopla for the Holidays

We’ve shared and celebrated plenty of holidays from across the Tooniverse. Ramadan and Festa Junina, Lunar New Year and Kwanzaa, Hanukkah and Christmas – even Easter and St Patrick’s Day! From Thanksgiving to Valentoon’s Day, we’ve celebrated so many important holidays and events that represent the true variety of Toony culture – and, most importantly, let’s not forget...

Pie Day! Mmm, pies…

We’ve celebrated important milestones and updates, we’ve recapped the events at ToonFest, we’ve showcased so much of your amazing artwork and creativity over the years, but never any artwork of me! Seriously! What does it take for a dog to get drawn around here?

Speaking of creativity, we’ve shown off so many talented in-toon-viduals over the years who’ve won TOONY Awards! So many talented individuals, and I’m always blown away! Each year, the entries seem to get better and better! Have you entered this year’s TOONYs yet?

We’ve showcased our Pride, we’ve kept your safety in shape, and we've even shared Julius Wheezer’s many misfortunes with those Back Stabbers! That little mouse can’t catch a break, can he?

We’ve had elections for Toon Species and Presidents, we’ve gone backstage and showcased so much about how Toontown ticks! We’ve also had plenty of tweaks and Toon-Ups to talk about! From the discovery of Doodles to that very first Field Office in Kaboomberg, the Toontown Blog has covered it all!

Toontown's Top Toons

The Toontown Blog has also been home to some of Toontown’s wildest, most incredible characters! We’ve had Samantha Spade, Shorty Fuse and Smokey Joe’s firework fights, but there’s no one more wild than Cartoonival’s very own Riggy Marole.

It’s been 10 YEARS since Riggy first came out to play, and I can’t imagine life without him. That guy’s wacky ideas are almost as good as mine! Have you seen his house!? Originally, he wanted me to sit in that Duck Tank of his! I should have a word with Riggy, maybe we could put our minds together to create something truly magical…

We couldn’t celebrate the 1000th Blog Post without remembering the close Presidential race between our friends Slappy and Flippy! Thanks to Alec Tinn’s time at the Electoral College, the Toon Council Presidential Election went as smoothly as possible!

Well, if you ignore the very first Cog Invasion, the pie explosions, the delays, the broken cannons…

Whilst that election may have been over ten years ago, we’ll never forget Slappy, and I promise we will find him one day.

Outstanding Organizations

Over the years, we’ve cataloged many of the mishaps and inventions of Loony Labs’ Scientoon entourage. Remember how so much seemed to happen around the 26th? That was a weird coincidence, right? They’ve adventured into The Grey, slapped together countless inventions, and even turned some of our beloved Toon Council into P.L.U.S.H.!

I sure hope that doesn’t happen again…

I keep thinking back to the elephant and the ape that went missing back when we first started… Enough time has passed for me to admit it was my fault, right? Toon HQ still has all those extra periscopes out looking for them!

The Toontown Blog has also benefited our friends over at the Toon Resistance. We’ve helped them recruit, we’ve released their reports, and we’ve even promoted their operations! Let’s be honest, the Resistance couldn’t have done anything without me. I wonder who I have to speak to about organizing an operation of my own...

Operation: Level Loontown – I’ve still got a ball to pick with them!

Max's Masterplans

When I realized the 1000th Blog Post was coming up, I tried to think of the best way to celebrate. I spent weeks coming up with a plan, trying to concoct a concept that would top all of my previous ideas. I knew I had to pull out all the stops.

I spent hours researching and consulting past blog posts, looking for ideas. I thought back to my brief time as a Pirate of the Jellybe-an, then remembered how quickly that idea sank. I thought about running a street racing circuit, then remembered that I’m still technically on the run from the TTPD – whoops.

Forget about it! I’m not doing community service again! Honestly, I really should steer clear of karts entirely! I thought back to the odd nightmare I had about a “Roger Dog Day”, then remembered that was too crazy even for me to make work.

I then decided to look at the many pranks that we’ve pulled! From BBQHQ to stealing the Factory Foreman’s glasses, we’ve showcased a lot of great pranks over the years! So many great April Toon’s jokes… You know, Team LHAAFBBHQ weren’t too pleased about the first one! Speaking of Team LHAAFBBHQ, I wonder where they are?

That’s when it hit me. (Ow.)

I’m Sir Max! I can make ANYTHING work! Surely, if anyone is going to be able to pull off a fantastic event to celebrate this magnificent milestone, it’s me! I marched straight into the last Toon Council meeting, noticed Lord Lowden Clear was mysteriously missing, and gave my proposal. I had thought everything through. 

I was going to hold the Greatest Party in the Tooniverse. I'd get Slappy’s Hot Air Balloon out of storage, and that’s just the beginning! I’d track down that elephant, I’d create some extra silly outfits, and I’d finally find Slappy! I was even going to give an exclusive, one-night-only, rendition of my original, TOONY Award-winning one-Toon play, "Maxlet"!

It was going to put Riggy’s Cartoonival to shame!

If you can’t tell by now, the Toon Council shot down my idea. Just like when Flippy’s Plane collided with Slappy’s Balloon, my idea came crashing down. I’d even found the perfect real estate location for it! Apparently, they don’t have enough time to sort out all the permits I needed! I told them I’d do it without any permits, but they don’t trust me enough – hmph.

I seriously can’t think of any reason why!

Even if they did, though, apparently that prime location has already been earmarked for a little something called “Clear Coasts...” Sigh. I called dibs first and everything! Unfortunately, I’ll have to put a pin in my extravagant plans. There’s always the next milestone, eh?

Beyond the Blog

All this reminiscing has reminded me of just how much the Toontown Blog has changed over the years – we’re well past Alpha Keys and Daily Alpha Updates, for a start!

While my role as a Toon Trooper has shifted a lot, the Toontown Blog will always hold a special place in my heart. You can always count on me to stop by to share my latest adventures in Toontown! With that, Toontown Blog Post #1000 is in the bag – now let’s see if I can convince the Toon Council to let me write 1,000 more. (Spoiler alert: I already started!)

Thanks for sticking with us through the lots of Laffs, the kart crashes, the Cog clashes, and the beautiful buffoonery. Whether you’ve been here since the very first Blog Post or you just wandered in for the jellybeans – you're a part of what makes the Toontown Blog special. Here’s to the next 1,000 blog posts, and all the Toontastic memories still to come!